1 00:00:00,700 --> 00:00:03,800 Christmas is the most magical time of the year, 2 00:00:03,800 --> 00:00:06,800 the one day when you can eat chocolate, nuts and sprouts 3 00:00:06,800 --> 00:00:11,200 and watch television...apart from all the other days you can do that. 4 00:00:11,200 --> 00:00:15,580 Whether you're a Christian or a Jew, a Muslim or a Hindu, 5 00:00:15,580 --> 00:00:17,460 a Jedi or a Womble, 6 00:00:17,460 --> 00:00:20,180 Christmas is everywhere. 7 00:00:20,180 --> 00:00:21,900 On television, 8 00:00:21,900 --> 00:00:23,460 in the high street, 9 00:00:23,460 --> 00:00:26,700 even in normally sacred places like churches. 10 00:00:26,700 --> 00:00:28,780 Christmas is such a big deal 11 00:00:28,780 --> 00:00:31,300 that even Richard Dawkins probably does it 12 00:00:31,300 --> 00:00:34,020 and he thinks God's a twat who isn't even there! 13 00:00:34,020 --> 00:00:36,220 But what is Christmas anyway? 14 00:00:36,220 --> 00:00:39,500 Do we still need it in 2016? 15 00:00:39,500 --> 00:00:43,180 I'm going on a journey right up Christmas to discover 16 00:00:43,180 --> 00:00:46,860 whether the true meaning of Christmas has any meaning today, 17 00:00:46,860 --> 00:00:49,420 or whether that meaning snapped off somewhere along the way, 18 00:00:49,420 --> 00:00:51,500 leaving it meaningless... 19 00:00:51,500 --> 00:00:53,540 whatever that means. 20 00:00:53,540 --> 00:00:56,380 I'll be talking to experts about every single Christmas 21 00:00:56,380 --> 00:00:59,340 that's ever happened, as well as finding out where 22 00:00:59,340 --> 00:01:02,660 Christmas traditions and giant tubes of Jaffa Cakes come from. 23 00:01:02,660 --> 00:01:05,540 How do they make chickens into turkeys? 24 00:01:05,540 --> 00:01:09,820 Turkey and chicken are two separate birds. 25 00:01:11,500 --> 00:01:14,420 You're joking me. No. 26 00:01:14,420 --> 00:01:16,460 So join me, Philomena Cunk, 27 00:01:16,460 --> 00:01:20,340 as I step into Christmas and back out again. 28 00:01:20,340 --> 00:01:25,180 This programme contains very strong language 29 00:01:30,540 --> 00:01:34,140 Christmas, isn't just tinsel and a long Doctor Who - 30 00:01:34,140 --> 00:01:37,100 it's a festival with traditions stretching back 31 00:01:37,100 --> 00:01:40,900 across hundreds of years and almost as many Christmases. 32 00:01:40,900 --> 00:01:44,020 It's hard to imagine now, but, when Christmas first began, 33 00:01:44,020 --> 00:01:46,460 Christ wasn't even in it. 34 00:01:46,460 --> 00:01:49,700 Psycho Danny Dyer hasn't always been in EastEnders, 35 00:01:49,700 --> 00:01:52,780 even though he feels like part of the furniture... 36 00:01:52,780 --> 00:01:54,740 especially when he's trying to act. 37 00:01:54,740 --> 00:01:57,500 Centuries before Jesus arrived, 38 00:01:57,500 --> 00:02:01,260 late December was already a time of celebration for the pagans, 39 00:02:01,260 --> 00:02:04,820 who existed so long ago there aren't any YouTubes of them, 40 00:02:04,820 --> 00:02:07,460 so we've had to make do with this picture. 41 00:02:07,460 --> 00:02:10,300 To find out what the pagans were, I spoke to an expert. 42 00:02:10,300 --> 00:02:13,580 Were there pagans before there were humans? 43 00:02:13,580 --> 00:02:16,580 No. You've got to be a human to do anything. 44 00:02:16,580 --> 00:02:20,900 Pagans are just people who lived in Europe before Christianity arrived. 45 00:02:20,900 --> 00:02:25,340 How difficult was it for the pagans to get about on all fours? 46 00:02:25,340 --> 00:02:29,180 They didn't travel on all fours, they travelled upright like we do. 47 00:02:29,180 --> 00:02:33,060 The pagans worshipped nature, just like Chris Packham, 48 00:02:33,060 --> 00:02:36,900 and their calendar revolved around two big annual events, 49 00:02:36,900 --> 00:02:39,140 also like Chris Packham. 50 00:02:39,140 --> 00:02:42,180 One of these events took place in late December and was known as the 51 00:02:42,180 --> 00:02:44,220 winter solstices-es. 52 00:02:44,220 --> 00:02:46,420 What was the winter soltits? 53 00:02:46,420 --> 00:02:48,500 It's the winter solstice. 54 00:02:48,500 --> 00:02:50,460 Stols...stolstice? 55 00:02:50,460 --> 00:02:52,940 Solstice. Stolestice. 56 00:02:52,940 --> 00:02:55,740 Solstice. Solstice. You've got it. 57 00:02:55,740 --> 00:02:58,900 It's that magical time, midwinter and midsummer, 58 00:02:58,900 --> 00:03:01,980 when the sun seems to stand still. 59 00:03:01,980 --> 00:03:05,660 To the eye, it appears to stop moving along the horizon. 60 00:03:05,660 --> 00:03:07,580 Well, you're not meant to look at it, are you? 61 00:03:07,580 --> 00:03:09,220 Because it hurts your eyes. 62 00:03:09,220 --> 00:03:11,820 You can look at it when it rises and you can look at it when it sets, 63 00:03:11,820 --> 00:03:13,900 then you can... No, you can't. It makes you go blind. 64 00:03:13,900 --> 00:03:15,780 You can. Believe... trust me, you can. 65 00:03:15,780 --> 00:03:17,940 You can't. That's probably why you've got glasses. 66 00:03:17,940 --> 00:03:19,700 As well as blinding themselves, 67 00:03:19,700 --> 00:03:23,940 the pagans celebrated the solstice by cutting down holly and ivy and 68 00:03:23,940 --> 00:03:25,460 dragging it into their homes, 69 00:03:25,460 --> 00:03:28,940 along with a giant Yule log which they'd set fire to. 70 00:03:28,940 --> 00:03:31,980 It sounds rubbish, but with no App Store to speak of, 71 00:03:31,980 --> 00:03:35,260 killing trees and plants was as good as entertainment got, 72 00:03:35,260 --> 00:03:37,220 even at Christmas. 73 00:03:37,220 --> 00:03:38,860 Of course, for most people, 74 00:03:38,860 --> 00:03:42,140 it wasn't really Christmas until the birth of Jesus Christ, 75 00:03:42,140 --> 00:03:47,220 an icon who was almost as revered back then as Beyonce is today. 76 00:03:47,220 --> 00:03:50,420 Jesus's mum was this woman, the Virgin Mary, 77 00:03:50,420 --> 00:03:52,660 who one night got visited by an angel 78 00:03:52,660 --> 00:03:55,940 and told she'd been gotten pregnant by a Holy Ghost. 79 00:03:55,940 --> 00:03:59,460 Of course, actual ghosts jizz ectoplasm, 80 00:03:59,460 --> 00:04:02,220 which only contains ghost sperm. 81 00:04:02,220 --> 00:04:04,700 But Jesus wasn't born a phantom, 82 00:04:04,700 --> 00:04:09,460 leading experts to believe Mary wasn't impregnated by a real ghost, 83 00:04:09,460 --> 00:04:13,620 but by a man in a sheet, like in Scooby-Doo. 84 00:04:13,620 --> 00:04:17,660 Mary's husband Joseph didn't mind his son being God's rather than his 85 00:04:17,660 --> 00:04:20,900 because he knew God would probably buy Jesus loads of toys 86 00:04:20,900 --> 00:04:24,740 and have him on weekends, which would take the pressure off. 87 00:04:24,740 --> 00:04:26,420 As the birth neared, 88 00:04:26,420 --> 00:04:30,100 Mary and Joseph travelled to O Little Town Of Bethlehem 89 00:04:30,100 --> 00:04:33,300 only to discover the inn they'd booked had no rooms in it, 90 00:04:33,300 --> 00:04:36,020 so, instead, they were put up in a stable. 91 00:04:36,020 --> 00:04:39,620 Today, that'd lead to one red star on TripAdvisor. 92 00:04:39,620 --> 00:04:42,660 Back then, it led to one big star in the sky, 93 00:04:42,660 --> 00:04:46,500 which God put there, probably so they could see the baby coming out. 94 00:04:46,500 --> 00:04:49,580 Mary had to give birth here on the floor, 95 00:04:49,580 --> 00:04:52,860 like a crack addict, and then lay him in a manger. 96 00:04:52,860 --> 00:04:55,660 Manger is another word for trough 97 00:04:55,660 --> 00:04:58,460 and it's where we get the name for modern sandwich chain 98 00:04:58,460 --> 00:05:00,420 Ready To Trough. 99 00:05:00,420 --> 00:05:02,780 The baby Jesus wasn't an ordinary baby. 100 00:05:02,780 --> 00:05:05,380 He was born with a big yellow circle around his head, 101 00:05:05,380 --> 00:05:08,060 which must have been hell for Mary to push out, 102 00:05:08,060 --> 00:05:11,060 especially when you think nothing had ever been in or out of her down 103 00:05:11,060 --> 00:05:15,060 below before. If only he had been born a ghost after all, 104 00:05:15,060 --> 00:05:19,140 then he could've just floated out, clanking chains and going woo. 105 00:05:19,140 --> 00:05:23,700 Why do you think it's important that Jesus was born? 106 00:05:23,700 --> 00:05:28,780 Would it have been more interesting if he'd been built, like R2-D2? 107 00:05:30,820 --> 00:05:32,620 It would have been more interesting, 108 00:05:32,620 --> 00:05:35,860 but the important thing is that he can identify with us 109 00:05:35,860 --> 00:05:38,220 and he was a real human being. 110 00:05:38,220 --> 00:05:42,140 It makes him more sort of relatable, I suppose. Yes, very much so. 111 00:05:42,140 --> 00:05:45,820 But then, if he's meant to be like an ordinary bloke and he wanted to 112 00:05:45,820 --> 00:05:49,180 come across as an ordinary bloke, how come he had all, like, 113 00:05:49,180 --> 00:05:52,420 angels and kings at his stable on his birthday? 114 00:05:52,420 --> 00:05:56,580 Well, that was a bit weird, wasn't it? Mmm. Although, of course, 115 00:05:56,580 --> 00:05:59,900 I would want to say that angels are around all the time. 116 00:05:59,900 --> 00:06:04,940 You don't necessarily see them, there and then, but sometimes 117 00:06:04,940 --> 00:06:08,180 you catch a glimpse of something out of the corner of your eye, 118 00:06:08,180 --> 00:06:13,100 or maybe you smell a nice fragrance... 119 00:06:13,100 --> 00:06:14,860 Vanilla? Maybe. 120 00:06:14,860 --> 00:06:17,500 How many three wise men were there? 121 00:06:17,500 --> 00:06:19,540 Who knows? Oh. 122 00:06:19,540 --> 00:06:23,820 And I think only one of the Gospels refers to there being three. 123 00:06:23,820 --> 00:06:25,780 It's just three is a good number, isn't it? 124 00:06:25,780 --> 00:06:27,060 Yeah. It looks good. 125 00:06:27,060 --> 00:06:29,620 But there could have actually been 15 three wise men? 126 00:06:29,620 --> 00:06:30,740 Quite possibly, yes. 127 00:06:30,740 --> 00:06:34,300 It's humbling to think that Jesus started out with nothing, 128 00:06:34,300 --> 00:06:37,420 born not in a palace, but in a stable, 129 00:06:37,420 --> 00:06:41,460 just the ordinary son of an ordinary woman and an ordinary man, 130 00:06:41,460 --> 00:06:43,620 and God Almighty. 131 00:06:43,620 --> 00:06:48,900 Incredibly, the day he was born was only the beginning of Jesus's life. 132 00:06:48,900 --> 00:06:52,180 As a young man, he kept a low profile in the wood industry. 133 00:06:52,180 --> 00:06:55,460 But, when he was about 30, his career took off. 134 00:06:55,460 --> 00:06:57,580 He went on to appear in a number of 135 00:06:57,580 --> 00:07:01,340 thrilling and controversial paintings, windows and films. 136 00:07:01,340 --> 00:07:04,660 Today, Christ lives in the hearts of millions of believers, 137 00:07:04,660 --> 00:07:07,660 but still spends Sundays here, in his dad's house, 138 00:07:07,660 --> 00:07:10,500 so let's go and see if he's in. 139 00:07:10,500 --> 00:07:13,380 No-one was in, as usual, 140 00:07:13,380 --> 00:07:17,020 probably because the Church Wi-Fi isn't as good as Starbucks'. 141 00:07:17,020 --> 00:07:19,260 But standing in this old, creaky building 142 00:07:19,260 --> 00:07:21,900 gives you a real sense of history. 143 00:07:21,900 --> 00:07:24,140 Thanks to Jesus's popularity, 144 00:07:24,140 --> 00:07:27,980 Christmas was celebrated for hundreds of years, 145 00:07:27,980 --> 00:07:30,420 celebrated by people who were buried long ago 146 00:07:30,420 --> 00:07:33,500 but are still alive in the form of drawings of themselves, 147 00:07:33,500 --> 00:07:36,860 some dating back as far as the Middle Ages. 148 00:07:36,860 --> 00:07:40,820 In the Middle Ages, did they know it was the Middle Ages, 149 00:07:40,820 --> 00:07:44,260 or did they just think, "This is now"? 150 00:07:44,260 --> 00:07:47,540 You know, how did they know that they were halfway through time? 151 00:07:47,540 --> 00:07:49,140 They thought "this is now" 152 00:07:49,140 --> 00:07:51,180 and they thought they were incredibly advanced, 153 00:07:51,180 --> 00:07:53,940 this is the greatest moment that society would reach to. 154 00:07:53,940 --> 00:07:55,820 It'd be amazing, wouldn't it, to get someone, 155 00:07:55,820 --> 00:07:59,100 get a Tudor back that we could resuscitate... Yes. 156 00:07:59,100 --> 00:08:01,300 ..cryogenically or something... Yes. 157 00:08:01,300 --> 00:08:04,380 ..and then show him what had happened since he died? 158 00:08:04,380 --> 00:08:06,860 It would blow his mind, wouldn't it? It would. The internet... 159 00:08:06,860 --> 00:08:09,660 The internet. The internet. 160 00:08:09,660 --> 00:08:12,980 Google. Cars, aeroplanes... Fitbit watches. 161 00:08:12,980 --> 00:08:14,340 Fitbits. 162 00:08:14,340 --> 00:08:17,980 One thing our time traveller would recognise is the tradition 163 00:08:17,980 --> 00:08:21,420 of getting drunk and acting up at Christmas, which, back then, 164 00:08:21,420 --> 00:08:24,140 was known as wassailing. 165 00:08:24,140 --> 00:08:26,860 So, what was wassailing? 166 00:08:26,860 --> 00:08:30,980 Is that like a, sort of...a bit like bantz now? 167 00:08:30,980 --> 00:08:35,220 What's bantz? Bantz, it's like when someone's acting like a prick. 168 00:08:35,220 --> 00:08:38,140 Oh, really? What it is is basically a group of people, 169 00:08:38,140 --> 00:08:41,100 usually a group of men, go around from house to house 170 00:08:41,100 --> 00:08:42,980 with a big bowl of drink 171 00:08:42,980 --> 00:08:46,980 and they knock on your door and they sing songs and the idea is that 172 00:08:46,980 --> 00:08:51,260 you're going to swap a drink from their bowl for a gift. 173 00:08:51,260 --> 00:08:54,700 So it was a bit like trick or treating then, was it? 174 00:08:54,700 --> 00:08:56,380 It was very like trick or treating. 175 00:08:56,380 --> 00:08:58,180 And what sort of costumes would they do? 176 00:08:58,180 --> 00:09:01,020 Because there were already covered in shit, weren't they, with, like, 177 00:09:01,020 --> 00:09:03,660 slugs on them and mud and everything? 178 00:09:03,660 --> 00:09:05,700 They didn't usually wear costumes. 179 00:09:05,700 --> 00:09:08,820 It was also a way of creating community cohesion, 180 00:09:08,820 --> 00:09:10,380 going from house to house, 181 00:09:10,380 --> 00:09:13,220 it was something that was supposed to be fun as well. 182 00:09:13,220 --> 00:09:15,460 So that's really the very early beginnings of 183 00:09:15,460 --> 00:09:19,180 going from house to house singing carols. 184 00:09:19,180 --> 00:09:23,780 Because the history lady said that, we've now cut to this - 185 00:09:23,780 --> 00:09:29,460 some boys singing carols in a church...on earth. 186 00:09:29,460 --> 00:09:34,620 THEY SING "DING DONG MERRILY ON HIGH" 187 00:09:41,220 --> 00:09:45,100 OK, OK, I get it, yeah, thanks. 188 00:09:45,100 --> 00:09:48,140 How do you get the music into the words? 189 00:09:49,580 --> 00:09:55,460 Like, how do you attach the music to the words in your throat? 190 00:09:55,460 --> 00:09:58,700 We tend to attach the words to the music instead. 191 00:09:58,700 --> 00:10:01,100 You attach the words to the music? 192 00:10:01,100 --> 00:10:03,820 Yeah. As it's coming up through your throat? 193 00:10:03,820 --> 00:10:06,460 So does it feel like...? Where does the music come from? 194 00:10:06,460 --> 00:10:08,420 Does it feel like it's coming from your stomach, 195 00:10:08,420 --> 00:10:10,060 like you're going to be sick? 196 00:10:10,060 --> 00:10:12,180 But it's, like, nice sick? 197 00:10:12,180 --> 00:10:14,260 Kind of, I guess. 198 00:10:14,260 --> 00:10:17,220 Not all Christmas songs are quite so religious. 199 00:10:17,220 --> 00:10:21,460 In the 1970s, groups like Slade reinvented the carol, 200 00:10:21,460 --> 00:10:23,620 appearing on our TV screens, 201 00:10:23,620 --> 00:10:27,420 showcasing a new form of singing called shouting. 202 00:10:27,420 --> 00:10:30,820 MUSIC: Merry Christmas Everybody by Slade 203 00:10:30,820 --> 00:10:35,460 This music was loud, probably to keep Jimmy Savile away. 204 00:10:35,460 --> 00:10:39,140 For years, having a Christmas number one was the ultimate music industry 205 00:10:39,140 --> 00:10:40,860 badge of honour, 206 00:10:40,860 --> 00:10:43,700 right up there with choking to death on your own sick. 207 00:10:43,700 --> 00:10:47,460 More recently, songs released from glossy TV shows like X Factor 208 00:10:47,460 --> 00:10:50,100 took over the Christmas number one slot. 209 00:10:50,100 --> 00:10:52,340 What's clever is that these songs 210 00:10:52,340 --> 00:10:55,220 have got absolutely no Christmas in them whatsoever, 211 00:10:55,220 --> 00:10:58,420 probably because if Simon Cowell touches anything 212 00:10:58,420 --> 00:11:00,660 to do with Christ, he catches fire. 213 00:11:00,660 --> 00:11:02,980 Meanwhile, back in the past, 214 00:11:02,980 --> 00:11:06,140 by the time the Tudor era arrived and the music all sounded 215 00:11:06,140 --> 00:11:09,580 like what you're hearing now, Christmas had become an excuse 216 00:11:09,580 --> 00:11:12,420 for gastronomic indulgence. 217 00:11:12,420 --> 00:11:15,100 Tudor feasts were huge 218 00:11:15,100 --> 00:11:18,500 and often included roast goose or swan or peacock, 219 00:11:18,500 --> 00:11:21,580 basically a big bird roasted whole. 220 00:11:21,580 --> 00:11:25,860 That might sound traumatic, but, in the days before television, 221 00:11:25,860 --> 00:11:29,340 they didn't know big birds have a person inside. 222 00:11:29,340 --> 00:11:31,740 To find out more about Tudor eating habits, 223 00:11:31,740 --> 00:11:34,820 I spoke to food expert Jay Rayner. 224 00:11:34,820 --> 00:11:39,300 So, what sort of things did Tudor people eat at Christmas? 225 00:11:39,300 --> 00:11:41,060 They ate things like peacock, didn't they? 226 00:11:41,060 --> 00:11:43,500 What goes with peacock? 227 00:11:43,500 --> 00:11:45,180 What kind of gravy? 228 00:11:45,180 --> 00:11:49,300 There is evidence that they ate very exotic things, 229 00:11:49,300 --> 00:11:52,340 but that would have been the very, very richest people. 230 00:11:52,340 --> 00:11:55,140 I suppose the best thing about them as well is that tail 231 00:11:55,140 --> 00:11:57,140 and that's not going to taste of anything, is it? 232 00:11:57,140 --> 00:11:59,060 No, that's purely for display. Hmm. Yeah. 233 00:11:59,060 --> 00:12:04,340 A Tudor Christmas, then, they'd have peacock, like you say... 234 00:12:04,340 --> 00:12:08,100 No, I think like YOU said. The Royals had peacock? 235 00:12:08,100 --> 00:12:12,780 I don't know how much peacock was eaten in Tudor days, I'll be honest. 236 00:12:12,780 --> 00:12:14,780 How did that affect their bowels, you know, 237 00:12:14,780 --> 00:12:16,260 what comes out of their back holes? 238 00:12:16,260 --> 00:12:19,500 I don't know. I suppose, if they were eating too much, 239 00:12:19,500 --> 00:12:21,980 it would have caused certain bowel issues. 240 00:12:21,980 --> 00:12:24,140 I suppose meat, lots of meat... 241 00:12:24,140 --> 00:12:26,500 Lots of meat can... ..compacted together. 242 00:12:26,500 --> 00:12:28,420 Can compact, yes. 243 00:12:28,420 --> 00:12:30,460 And make sort of big, hard stools. 244 00:12:30,460 --> 00:12:34,540 It would have been uncomfortable, I imagine, but I'm only guessing. 245 00:12:34,540 --> 00:12:36,900 See, that would've been the first bit that I'd have gone to 246 00:12:36,900 --> 00:12:39,020 if I was a food expert. 247 00:12:39,020 --> 00:12:42,420 Just when our ancestors were getting well into Christmas indulgence, 248 00:12:42,420 --> 00:12:46,780 history shat out someone who was allergic to fun, Oliver Cromwell, 249 00:12:46,780 --> 00:12:48,540 king of the Puritans. 250 00:12:48,540 --> 00:12:52,180 Cromwell was a Member of Parliament who wouldn't wear smart clothes and 251 00:12:52,180 --> 00:12:54,660 never smiled, a bit like Jeremy Corbyn. 252 00:12:54,660 --> 00:12:57,700 And, just like Corbyn, he wanted to change the country. 253 00:12:57,700 --> 00:12:59,820 But instead of sitting down on a train, 254 00:12:59,820 --> 00:13:02,180 he got off his arse and did something about it - 255 00:13:02,180 --> 00:13:04,580 by starting a Civil War. 256 00:13:04,580 --> 00:13:08,740 Civil War is like a real war, but not abroad, so it's cheaper, 257 00:13:08,740 --> 00:13:12,500 and that meant ordinary people could start one, not just kings. 258 00:13:12,500 --> 00:13:15,500 The English Civil War divided the country down the middle, 259 00:13:15,500 --> 00:13:18,540 like a sort of tooled-up Brexit. 260 00:13:18,540 --> 00:13:20,860 Cromwell won and cut the king's head off, 261 00:13:20,860 --> 00:13:23,260 which meant he couldn't be the king any more, 262 00:13:23,260 --> 00:13:25,380 even if everyone changed their minds. 263 00:13:25,380 --> 00:13:28,140 Now the British public had taken back control. 264 00:13:28,140 --> 00:13:31,180 No longer did they have to do whatever the king said. 265 00:13:31,180 --> 00:13:34,660 Instead, they were free to do whatever Cromwell said. 266 00:13:34,660 --> 00:13:38,340 It turned out Cromwell hated all of the things kings like, 267 00:13:38,340 --> 00:13:41,940 like feasting and burping and music and throwing chicken legs over his 268 00:13:41,940 --> 00:13:45,300 shoulder and laughing, and that was just the tip of the turnip, 269 00:13:45,300 --> 00:13:50,300 because, in 1647, Cromwell banned Christmas. 270 00:13:50,300 --> 00:13:53,740 According to the Puritans, Christians shouldn't celebrate 271 00:13:53,740 --> 00:13:55,980 Christmas because it's not in the Bible. 272 00:13:55,980 --> 00:13:59,260 Instead, they should be inside a church, which isn't in the Bible, 273 00:13:59,260 --> 00:14:02,900 reading the Bible, which isn't in the Bible. 274 00:14:02,900 --> 00:14:07,540 The ban on Christmas continued until after Cromwell's death, 275 00:14:07,540 --> 00:14:11,580 but, by 1660, we'd found a new king, up a tree. 276 00:14:11,580 --> 00:14:13,460 The new king even had a head, 277 00:14:13,460 --> 00:14:15,860 although it looked a bit like it belonged to Boycie 278 00:14:15,860 --> 00:14:18,140 off Only Fools And Horses. 279 00:14:18,140 --> 00:14:21,380 And now the monarch was back and the Puritans had buggered off, 280 00:14:21,380 --> 00:14:25,140 Christmas was free to become more festive and less religious. 281 00:14:25,140 --> 00:14:28,060 For years, Jesus H Christmas was the number one face of the festive 282 00:14:28,060 --> 00:14:32,420 period, very much the Captain Birdseye of Christmas Day, 283 00:14:32,420 --> 00:14:36,780 but his rule over his mighty tinsel kingdom was to be threatened by 284 00:14:36,780 --> 00:14:39,380 this man, Father Christmas, 285 00:14:39,380 --> 00:14:41,500 street name - Santa Claus. 286 00:14:41,500 --> 00:14:45,980 Like Jesus, Father Christmas is used as a bribe to make children behave, 287 00:14:45,980 --> 00:14:49,580 although, in his case, the prize isn't eternal salvation, 288 00:14:49,580 --> 00:14:52,020 but presents. 289 00:14:52,020 --> 00:14:54,700 No wonder the moment Santa came on the scene 290 00:14:54,700 --> 00:14:56,300 it was game over for Jesus, 291 00:14:56,300 --> 00:15:00,340 who had to accept a lower ranking job in the global icon industry. 292 00:15:00,340 --> 00:15:02,780 So, where did Santa come from? 293 00:15:02,780 --> 00:15:05,020 If you're thinking the North Pole, 294 00:15:05,020 --> 00:15:07,460 that's because your parents lied to you. 295 00:15:07,460 --> 00:15:11,780 He actually stepped out of the pages of history. 296 00:15:11,780 --> 00:15:13,980 Where did Father Christmas come from? 297 00:15:13,980 --> 00:15:16,540 Father Christmas comes from Saint Nicholas 298 00:15:16,540 --> 00:15:20,900 and he is a fourth-century Greek saint and bishop, 299 00:15:20,900 --> 00:15:23,900 and he was very renowned for giving presents to the poor 300 00:15:23,900 --> 00:15:26,940 and particularly he gave presents to these three girls. 301 00:15:26,940 --> 00:15:28,580 If he hadn't given them the money, 302 00:15:28,580 --> 00:15:30,820 they would have had to go off and be prostitutes. 303 00:15:30,820 --> 00:15:34,100 So why was he knocking about with these prostitutes? 304 00:15:34,100 --> 00:15:37,460 I don't think he knew them very well, it's just that... 305 00:15:37,460 --> 00:15:39,980 Well, well enough to give them gifts. 306 00:15:39,980 --> 00:15:42,180 ..give them money. I don't think... 307 00:15:42,180 --> 00:15:45,060 I think he just wanted to save them from the horrors of... 308 00:15:45,060 --> 00:15:47,500 I think because basically... They all say that, don't they? 309 00:15:47,500 --> 00:15:50,740 They do. How come shops have Father Christmases, 310 00:15:50,740 --> 00:15:52,940 but they don't have Jesuses? 311 00:15:52,940 --> 00:15:55,420 Is Jesuses the right term? 312 00:15:55,420 --> 00:15:59,220 Is it Jesi, or...? I think we'd say figures of Jesus. 313 00:15:59,220 --> 00:16:00,660 Figures of Jesus. 314 00:16:00,660 --> 00:16:03,220 I think that Father Christmas himself would probably have 315 00:16:03,220 --> 00:16:05,580 preferred there to be figures of Jesus because, in fact, 316 00:16:05,580 --> 00:16:08,460 there is a medieval story that Saint Nicholas got in a punch-up 317 00:16:08,460 --> 00:16:10,700 about whether or not God or Jesus was greater 318 00:16:10,700 --> 00:16:12,220 and was thrown into prison, 319 00:16:12,220 --> 00:16:15,700 so he was obviously very exercised about the purity of religion. 320 00:16:15,700 --> 00:16:17,300 It's all coming out, isn't it? 321 00:16:17,300 --> 00:16:20,180 You know, because, like, I didn't know that he used to hang about with 322 00:16:20,180 --> 00:16:22,940 prostitutes or get into fights. 323 00:16:22,940 --> 00:16:29,420 Now I'm feeling less...happy with him coming down my chimney. 324 00:16:29,420 --> 00:16:31,780 Despite being the stuff of nightmares, 325 00:16:31,780 --> 00:16:35,820 Santa is the world's most popular home intruder, probably because, 326 00:16:35,820 --> 00:16:38,700 unlike other home intruders, he doesn't leave a turd 327 00:16:38,700 --> 00:16:42,180 on your living room carpet, but a pile of gifts. 328 00:16:42,180 --> 00:16:45,420 Santa has a list of good and bad children. 329 00:16:45,420 --> 00:16:49,220 The good children will get lots of presents and so, it turns out, 330 00:16:49,220 --> 00:16:51,100 will the bad children. 331 00:16:51,100 --> 00:16:54,740 In fact, the only ones who won't get very much are the poor children - 332 00:16:54,740 --> 00:16:56,980 that's because Santa judges a child's goodness 333 00:16:56,980 --> 00:16:59,420 based largely on parental income. 334 00:16:59,420 --> 00:17:02,980 The sense of magical wonder on a child's face as they open their 335 00:17:02,980 --> 00:17:06,100 presents, which allegedly makes Christmas worthwhile, 336 00:17:06,100 --> 00:17:08,860 can last for up to ten seconds. 337 00:17:08,860 --> 00:17:13,460 That's why, for many, Christmas is synon-nonymous with little ones. 338 00:17:13,460 --> 00:17:17,020 Adults lose the ability to see Father Christmas, 339 00:17:17,020 --> 00:17:20,300 so, if you want to know more about him, you have to ask small adults, 340 00:17:20,300 --> 00:17:21,940 which are known as children. 341 00:17:21,940 --> 00:17:24,540 Hello, who are you? I'm Archie, who are you? 342 00:17:24,540 --> 00:17:27,900 Philomena. Have you ever met Father Christmas? 343 00:17:27,900 --> 00:17:29,060 I have. 344 00:17:29,060 --> 00:17:30,260 Where did you meet him? 345 00:17:30,260 --> 00:17:34,220 I met him...next to Westfield. 346 00:17:34,220 --> 00:17:36,980 And what was he doing there? Was he shopping or something? 347 00:17:36,980 --> 00:17:39,540 I think...I'm not quite sure if Father Christmas is rich. 348 00:17:39,540 --> 00:17:42,180 Mmm. I don't think he is. 349 00:17:42,180 --> 00:17:45,460 How did he get all the presents in, like, lots of times? 350 00:17:45,460 --> 00:17:48,340 I think he just shoplifts. 351 00:17:48,340 --> 00:17:49,980 OK. 352 00:17:49,980 --> 00:17:52,780 Do you think Father Christmas has ever met Batman? 353 00:17:52,780 --> 00:17:55,660 In my opinion, Batman's not real. 354 00:17:55,660 --> 00:18:02,060 In my opinion, Batman's not real - it's just a man called Bruce. 355 00:18:02,060 --> 00:18:04,420 So you don't think they've met? 356 00:18:04,420 --> 00:18:08,060 I think Superman and Father Christmas have met. 357 00:18:08,060 --> 00:18:11,340 Do you think that Father Christmas will still be allowed in the country 358 00:18:11,340 --> 00:18:14,260 after Brexit? Yeah, he'll still be allowed in the country. 359 00:18:14,260 --> 00:18:18,420 Will he? Yeah, because the police don't know where he's in the air. 360 00:18:18,420 --> 00:18:22,660 Like David Bowie, Santa experimented with many different looks, 361 00:18:22,660 --> 00:18:26,540 finally settling on the familiar fat jolly laughing man look 362 00:18:26,540 --> 00:18:28,780 in the late 1800s. 363 00:18:28,780 --> 00:18:31,660 The Queen Victorians were batshit for Christmas 364 00:18:31,660 --> 00:18:35,020 and popularised many of the traditions we still do 365 00:18:35,020 --> 00:18:36,740 for no good reason today. 366 00:18:36,740 --> 00:18:40,020 For instance, Queen Victoria's husband, Prince Albert, 367 00:18:40,020 --> 00:18:43,380 did what his fellow Germans had been doing for years and had a tree 368 00:18:43,380 --> 00:18:45,420 installed in his lounge. 369 00:18:45,420 --> 00:18:49,060 Albert's tree would remain the most heavily decorated piece of wood to 370 00:18:49,060 --> 00:18:52,940 grace Buckingham Palace until the day Roger Moore was knighted. 371 00:18:52,940 --> 00:18:54,940 The Christmas tree is still the centrepiece 372 00:18:54,940 --> 00:18:57,180 of most festive decorations. 373 00:18:57,180 --> 00:19:00,060 It's covered in lights, chocolates and baubles, 374 00:19:00,060 --> 00:19:02,620 which is what circles are called at Christmas. 375 00:19:02,620 --> 00:19:05,460 There are also these characteristic vines 376 00:19:05,460 --> 00:19:08,820 from the most festive plant on earth - tinsel. 377 00:19:08,820 --> 00:19:12,740 Tinsel became a decoration because you can't do anything else with it. 378 00:19:12,740 --> 00:19:16,620 It's horrible in salads and won't boil down for soup. 379 00:19:16,620 --> 00:19:19,140 For years, the best Christmas decoration 380 00:19:19,140 --> 00:19:21,180 was the Blue Peter Advent Crown, 381 00:19:21,180 --> 00:19:24,860 which took a load of coat hangers and tinsel and cleverly transformed 382 00:19:24,860 --> 00:19:27,900 them into a load of tinsel round some coat hangers. 383 00:19:27,900 --> 00:19:30,540 Now, you'll see how it all fits together. 384 00:19:30,540 --> 00:19:33,620 Today, some people choose to turn the outside of their homes 385 00:19:33,620 --> 00:19:35,580 into a giant Advent Crown. 386 00:19:35,580 --> 00:19:38,660 A jolly house covered in electric lights may be expensive 387 00:19:38,660 --> 00:19:40,220 and use a lot of power, 388 00:19:40,220 --> 00:19:43,500 but it's the perfect way to cheer up a world worried about climate change 389 00:19:43,500 --> 00:19:45,300 and dwindling resources. 390 00:19:45,300 --> 00:19:47,380 Of course, in Queen Victorian times, 391 00:19:47,380 --> 00:19:50,620 only the super rich had fancy decorations. 392 00:19:50,620 --> 00:19:53,500 Ordinary, poor people had to celebrate Christmas 393 00:19:53,500 --> 00:19:56,940 by coughing and counting their surviving offspring. 394 00:19:56,940 --> 00:19:59,860 Life in Queen Victorian times was hard. 395 00:19:59,860 --> 00:20:03,060 The streets were full of urchins and rippers, and there was so much 396 00:20:03,060 --> 00:20:06,700 poverty that people used to go to prison just to get some bread. 397 00:20:06,700 --> 00:20:08,940 But there was one man who cared - 398 00:20:08,940 --> 00:20:11,540 the greatest prime minister Britain ever had - 399 00:20:11,540 --> 00:20:13,780 Sir Charles Dickings. 400 00:20:13,780 --> 00:20:16,940 Charles Dickings wanted people to be generous to those in greater 401 00:20:16,940 --> 00:20:21,020 need, like the poor, the homeless or the dead, 402 00:20:21,020 --> 00:20:23,700 so he wrote something called A Christmas Carol, 403 00:20:23,700 --> 00:20:26,580 which was something called a book. 404 00:20:26,580 --> 00:20:29,700 As seen in this powerful and evocative adaptation, 405 00:20:29,700 --> 00:20:32,540 A Christmas Carol is about Ebenezer Scrooge, 406 00:20:32,540 --> 00:20:34,580 a character almost as fully realised 407 00:20:34,580 --> 00:20:37,460 as Disney's superior Scrooge McDuck. 408 00:20:37,460 --> 00:20:40,020 Unlike Scrooge McDuck, he's human. 409 00:20:40,020 --> 00:20:43,220 And unlike most humans, he hates Christmas. 410 00:20:43,220 --> 00:20:45,620 But then, in a terrifying development, 411 00:20:45,620 --> 00:20:48,060 he starts getting visited by ghosts, 412 00:20:48,060 --> 00:20:51,500 like his house is built on some sort of Indian burial ground. 413 00:20:51,500 --> 00:20:55,060 The ghosts take him forward and backwards in time to see different 414 00:20:55,060 --> 00:20:58,900 Christmases, like that thing on Facebook that shows you old haircuts 415 00:20:58,900 --> 00:21:01,100 and people you don't talk to anymore. 416 00:21:01,100 --> 00:21:04,620 One ghost shows him the future, but it's only by a year, 417 00:21:04,620 --> 00:21:07,620 so it's still a Victorian future. 418 00:21:07,620 --> 00:21:11,300 As it is, he sees a future in which everyone's delighted he's dead. 419 00:21:11,300 --> 00:21:15,100 This convinces him that Christmas is actually brilliant, which, 420 00:21:15,100 --> 00:21:17,180 to be honest, the ghost could have done 421 00:21:17,180 --> 00:21:20,540 by giving him a Chocolate Orange - nobody can argue with that. 422 00:21:22,220 --> 00:21:24,060 After the Victorian era, 423 00:21:24,060 --> 00:21:26,740 good will to all men caught on so much 424 00:21:26,740 --> 00:21:30,380 that it was almost 12 whole years before everyone on the planet 425 00:21:30,380 --> 00:21:32,420 decided to kill each other in the mud. 426 00:21:32,420 --> 00:21:35,060 Although it was scheduled to be over by Christmas, 427 00:21:35,060 --> 00:21:38,140 the war with Germany lasted four years. 428 00:21:38,140 --> 00:21:40,940 Mechanised conflict is the most horrifying legacy 429 00:21:40,940 --> 00:21:45,620 of the 20th century, as anyone who's seen Robot Wars will agree. 430 00:21:45,620 --> 00:21:49,380 But at Christmas 1914, there was a brief ceasefire. 431 00:21:49,380 --> 00:21:51,060 The fighting stopped. 432 00:21:51,060 --> 00:21:54,940 Soldiers got out of their holes and joined together in a place called 433 00:21:54,940 --> 00:21:58,180 No Man's Land, showing that, even at moments of peace, 434 00:21:58,180 --> 00:22:02,300 men will still divide into two sides and try to beat one another. 435 00:22:02,300 --> 00:22:06,100 The Great War claimed over 17 million lives, making it the 436 00:22:06,100 --> 00:22:09,580 worst incident of football-related violence of all time. 437 00:22:09,580 --> 00:22:14,460 After the First World War, Christmas spirit once again reigned supreme, 438 00:22:14,460 --> 00:22:16,180 until the Second World War. 439 00:22:16,180 --> 00:22:19,020 We don't know if Christmas happened during Second War Two 440 00:22:19,020 --> 00:22:21,060 because there simply aren't any records. 441 00:22:21,060 --> 00:22:24,980 But there's no footage of Hitler or Churchill in Santa hats either, 442 00:22:24,980 --> 00:22:28,860 so it's safe to assume it was parked while they twatted each other. 443 00:22:28,860 --> 00:22:32,700 Once Hitler had defeated the Nazis by blowing his own brains out, 444 00:22:32,700 --> 00:22:34,780 Christmas returned with a bang 445 00:22:34,780 --> 00:22:38,500 and a second period of food-loving indulgence dawned. 446 00:22:38,500 --> 00:22:41,060 The modern Christmas dinner soon became an important 447 00:22:41,060 --> 00:22:45,180 cultural cornerstone of both society and gravy adverts. 448 00:22:47,140 --> 00:22:49,060 Mum made the gravy. 449 00:22:49,060 --> 00:22:52,620 Could you talk me through what makes a perfect Christmas dinner? 450 00:22:52,620 --> 00:22:55,260 Once you've got the right people round the table, 451 00:22:55,260 --> 00:22:57,100 you need a light starter. 452 00:22:57,100 --> 00:22:59,660 If you give people too much... Not prawn cocktails? 453 00:22:59,660 --> 00:23:02,700 No, no... Well, I don't know. A good prawn cocktail is a lovely thing. 454 00:23:02,700 --> 00:23:05,220 I don't like prawns. Do you not? No, they're bottom feeders. 455 00:23:05,220 --> 00:23:09,300 OK, I tend to do platters of charcuterie, salami and ham, and 456 00:23:09,300 --> 00:23:11,540 maybe some pickles and things for people to pick up. 457 00:23:11,540 --> 00:23:14,340 I won't have that. You wouldn't have that? No. No? OK. 458 00:23:14,340 --> 00:23:17,100 And then you come to the main event, 459 00:23:17,100 --> 00:23:19,740 so maybe a three-bird roast or a roast goose... 460 00:23:19,740 --> 00:23:23,500 bread sauce, gravy. But I don't understand bread sauce. 461 00:23:23,500 --> 00:23:26,780 It's a great way of making a really savoury sauce. 462 00:23:26,780 --> 00:23:29,780 Bread and sauce are two completely different things, aren't they? 463 00:23:29,780 --> 00:23:33,260 Well, they are, but you can grind the bread down 464 00:23:33,260 --> 00:23:37,300 and then cook it in milk to make a really good sauce. 465 00:23:37,300 --> 00:23:40,740 It just looks like, sort of...jizz. 466 00:23:45,420 --> 00:23:48,420 Thanks to all this food-based indulgence, 467 00:23:48,420 --> 00:23:52,300 scientists now believe that 80% of all burps occur at Christmas, 468 00:23:52,300 --> 00:23:55,940 threatening to put a hole in the oz-one layer at precisely the 469 00:23:55,940 --> 00:23:58,860 moment the sky is full of vulnerable reindeer. 470 00:23:58,860 --> 00:24:02,700 Eating aside, the other popular form of Christmas indulgence 471 00:24:02,700 --> 00:24:04,740 is gift-buying from shops. 472 00:24:04,740 --> 00:24:07,540 Critics say Christmas is too commercialised 473 00:24:07,540 --> 00:24:11,140 and that the Bible has being replaced by the Argos catalogue, 474 00:24:11,140 --> 00:24:14,260 just because it's got a better selection of hair straighteners. 475 00:24:14,260 --> 00:24:17,140 Recently, Christmas shopping has started to look less like a 476 00:24:17,140 --> 00:24:19,180 Supermarket Sweep Christmas special 477 00:24:19,180 --> 00:24:22,060 and more like a civil war with carrier bags. 478 00:24:22,060 --> 00:24:26,460 No wonder more people than ever stay indoors shopping on the computer. 479 00:24:26,460 --> 00:24:29,380 So, is Christmas all just about buying stuff these days? 480 00:24:29,380 --> 00:24:31,820 How much money gets made at Christmas? 481 00:24:31,820 --> 00:24:33,420 Altogether, I'm sure we spend 482 00:24:33,420 --> 00:24:35,740 hundreds of millions of pounds at Christmas. 483 00:24:35,740 --> 00:24:38,620 And how big a cut does the Church get? 484 00:24:38,620 --> 00:24:40,060 The Church doesn't get anything. 485 00:24:40,060 --> 00:24:42,420 They don't get anything? No. No. 486 00:24:42,420 --> 00:24:45,500 The supermarket near me has got about 30 tills. 487 00:24:45,500 --> 00:24:48,980 How many tills does Amazon have? 488 00:24:48,980 --> 00:24:51,060 They must have loads. 489 00:24:51,060 --> 00:24:53,220 They don't have any tills. What? 490 00:24:53,220 --> 00:24:54,940 They have a computer. 491 00:24:54,940 --> 00:24:58,340 One computer? Yeah. Because no-one goes there, do they? 492 00:24:58,340 --> 00:25:00,940 They just... I know, but I thought they still had to ring it through. 493 00:25:00,940 --> 00:25:03,060 Mmm. No, the computer does all that. 494 00:25:03,060 --> 00:25:05,780 So there's one man at a computer, just going...? 495 00:25:05,780 --> 00:25:07,260 No, I don't think there's a man. 496 00:25:07,260 --> 00:25:11,500 No, no, it just goes automatically. You do that. You're the till. 497 00:25:11,500 --> 00:25:15,420 Making money is so important at Christmas that shops pull out all 498 00:25:15,420 --> 00:25:18,780 the stops to fill the screen with jolly images of buying things 499 00:25:18,780 --> 00:25:22,340 and their adverts have evolved from cheerful animated catalogues full of 500 00:25:22,340 --> 00:25:24,340 famous people smiling at you 501 00:25:24,340 --> 00:25:28,220 to heart-warming present-day mini movies about infested trampolines. 502 00:25:30,860 --> 00:25:33,700 Adverts aren't the only programmes on at Christmas - 503 00:25:33,700 --> 00:25:38,020 there are also programmes on at Christmas. 504 00:25:38,020 --> 00:25:41,860 For decades, Christmas television has been an enchanting place, 505 00:25:41,860 --> 00:25:45,260 a magical land where people danced and sang in a doomed attempt 506 00:25:45,260 --> 00:25:48,620 to convey the sheer magic of Christmas. 507 00:25:48,620 --> 00:25:52,020 A time in which newsreaders cavorted with comedians, 508 00:25:52,020 --> 00:25:55,020 and real live snowmen were gathered from the wild 509 00:25:55,020 --> 00:25:56,900 and encouraged to sing their 510 00:25:56,900 --> 00:25:59,700 haunting traditional songs in the studio. 511 00:25:59,700 --> 00:26:02,740 THEY SING "JINGLE BELLS" 512 00:26:13,540 --> 00:26:17,580 But perhaps the most reassuring Christmas programme is EastEnders, 513 00:26:17,580 --> 00:26:20,860 which for years has provided an important public service 514 00:26:20,860 --> 00:26:25,900 by depicting worse families having an even shitter time than yours. 515 00:26:25,900 --> 00:26:28,140 You're lying! 516 00:26:28,140 --> 00:26:30,380 What are you doing? Bianca! 517 00:26:30,380 --> 00:26:33,420 What are you doing?! 518 00:26:33,420 --> 00:26:36,660 Films are a mainstay at Christmas 519 00:26:36,660 --> 00:26:40,580 and one familiar film is the searing musical The Sound Of Music, 520 00:26:40,580 --> 00:26:45,460 which is about a woman who sings to hills about hills in the hills. 521 00:26:45,460 --> 00:26:49,580 with the sound of music... 522 00:26:51,700 --> 00:26:53,460 It's always on at Christmas, 523 00:26:53,460 --> 00:26:56,780 probably because it's got nuns in it so you think about Jesus. 524 00:26:56,780 --> 00:26:59,220 And also Nazis, 525 00:26:59,220 --> 00:27:03,140 so you think about The Great Escape, which is probably on on Boxing Day. 526 00:27:03,140 --> 00:27:07,740 But the most Christmassy film of all time is also the most exciting, 527 00:27:07,740 --> 00:27:09,380 Die Hard. 528 00:27:09,380 --> 00:27:13,220 People think Die Hard is a gripping and exciting action film, 529 00:27:13,220 --> 00:27:15,700 just because, as you can see, it is, 530 00:27:15,700 --> 00:27:18,700 but it's also a heart-warming Yuletide story 531 00:27:18,700 --> 00:27:20,740 full of the magic of Christmas. 532 00:27:20,740 --> 00:27:22,740 It's got everything... 533 00:27:22,740 --> 00:27:26,740 'Singing...' HE SCREAMS 534 00:27:26,740 --> 00:27:28,500 '..a man up a chimney...' 535 00:27:28,500 --> 00:27:30,700 Warming yourself in front of a roaring fire... 536 00:27:30,700 --> 00:27:33,980 Shit! 537 00:27:33,980 --> 00:27:36,460 '..while the snow flutters down outside.' 538 00:27:36,460 --> 00:27:37,980 Brotherly love... 539 00:27:37,980 --> 00:27:40,420 'Hey, look, I love you... 540 00:27:40,420 --> 00:27:42,340 'So do a lot of the other guys.' 541 00:27:42,340 --> 00:27:45,700 ..cranberry sauce, excessive sherry drinking... 542 00:27:47,820 --> 00:27:50,580 God, that man looks really pissed. 543 00:27:50,580 --> 00:27:52,220 ..season's greetings... 544 00:27:52,220 --> 00:27:54,100 Yippee-ki-yay, motherfucker. 545 00:27:54,100 --> 00:27:57,300 ..your dad conked out in a chair wearing a Santa hat in his Christmas 546 00:27:57,300 --> 00:28:02,220 jumper, angels majestically soaring through the air and, of course, 547 00:28:02,220 --> 00:28:04,060 Jesus Christ Powell. 548 00:28:04,060 --> 00:28:06,660 Jesus Christ, Powell! 549 00:28:06,660 --> 00:28:11,060 TV's becoming a thing of the olden past, like sundials or ploughs, 550 00:28:11,060 --> 00:28:14,580 because, today, everyone has their own little screen, 551 00:28:14,580 --> 00:28:18,260 so they can ignore their immediate surroundings on an individual basis 552 00:28:18,260 --> 00:28:21,140 instead of as part of a collective effort. 553 00:28:21,140 --> 00:28:24,580 We're often told to feel sorry for those who are alone at Christmas, 554 00:28:24,580 --> 00:28:27,980 but these days that's all of us and it's brilliant. 555 00:28:27,980 --> 00:28:29,820 Best of all, this kind of technology 556 00:28:29,820 --> 00:28:33,100 is set to become more immersive than ever. 557 00:28:33,100 --> 00:28:36,740 For instance, this man from the year 2018 558 00:28:36,740 --> 00:28:39,380 is enjoying a virtual Christmas with a family 559 00:28:39,380 --> 00:28:42,340 of characters from the Nintendo universe. 560 00:28:42,340 --> 00:28:46,460 Meanwhile, this man is experiencing the true meaning of Christmas by 561 00:28:46,460 --> 00:28:50,340 giving birth to a virtual baby Jesus in a stable made of polygons. 562 00:28:50,340 --> 00:28:52,780 HE SCREAMS 563 00:28:52,780 --> 00:28:56,220 Today, the true meaning of Christmas is a mystery, 564 00:28:56,220 --> 00:28:59,860 wrapped up in sherry and Monopoly and monkey nuts, 565 00:28:59,860 --> 00:29:02,940 but at least, at this time of togetherness and warmth, 566 00:29:02,940 --> 00:29:06,220 we can all agree what the true spirit of Christmas is... 567 00:29:08,180 --> 00:29:09,700 Baileys. 568 00:29:10,900 --> 00:29:13,060 SHE SLURPS NOISILY 569 00:29:14,300 --> 00:29:17,500 Merry Christmas and a very New Year.